Sunday, August 2, 2009
So all-in-all life is good here...no really good. Apparently the economy is in the crapper, the world in shambles but here I sit in my own little Utopia, ambovelent to other harsh realities because this is my reality....
Friday, July 10, 2009
My final belly shot at 39 Weeks
The story becomes painfully boring at this point because I am checked again for dilatation and nothing has changed from my 38 week appointment and they start the Pitocin drip at 2mg. A half an hour later it is turned to 4mg. Then another half an hour the new 'feisty' nurse turns it to 6mg, all the while I am feeling nothing and just reading magazines. At this point the nurse disappears for over and hour and the next person to walk into my room is Dr. Meckler who explains that my nurse has been working on an admin issue involving me not having an HIV test on record. Oh, please. She clears the issue and sets the pit at 7mg. It is about 7:30 PM. The Pitocin keeps getting turned up like this and around 1:30 AM they page the on call doc in to break my water. I wonder to myself if I should ask for the epidural even though I am not in any real pain, just a bit uncomfortable. I decide to wait. John falls asleep. Nothing continues to happen.
Looking a little disheveled but still smiling...
I decided to get the epidural sometime around 3 AM, mainly because I was hoping it would help me relax and get some sleep. At this point the nurse decides my fluid levels are too low and pumps my uterus with water to give the baby more room to move. At 7 AM my doctor returns and I had just been checked by the nurse and was still only 3-4 cm dilated. You've got to be kidding me. My doctor heads into surgery and I continue to wait. At this point the Pitocin is up to about 18mg. I feel no pain, just tired and hungry.
Finally somewhere around 8AM I start to feel a whole lot of pressure and I tell John that I am positive I am close to 10 cm. I feel ready to push. My nurse comes in to check and sure enough I am ready!! But my doctor isn't so they turned the Pitocin off and turned the epidural up. Fantastic...more waiting. I stayed like this until almost 11 AM when my doctor showed up and they prepared the room. Five easy pushes and 15 minutes later Elliott was here but not before he made a grand entrance, just like his big bro. This boy had the cord wrapped around his neck and so when he came out he was grayish blue instead of the nice rosy pink color he should have been. The baby nurses immediately started massaging him and extracting fluids from his mouth. I, on the other hand, nearly bled to death on the bed while being injected with several doses of blood clotters and yet somehow I could not have been happier.
The bleeding eventually stopped and they brought Elliott to me all wrapped up and looking quite pink and healthy and hungry. He immediately latches on enjoys his first meal a la boob.
You know, all the waiting was a pain in the ass. It really was and seemed sooo many times that it could have been avoided but I tell you, I would have waited an eternity to enjoy those moments after birth when he was brought back to me to eat. It was one of the happiest I had ever been in my life. I felt cheated out of this part of the experience with Finn. He was taken from me and sent to Special Care for 72 long horrible hours. So after an entire day of waiting to check into the hospital, 18 hours of a long boring pit drip, 15 minutes of painless pushing, almost an hour after birth of near bleeding to death it was all so worth it to be able to hold my baby in my arms and nourish him for the first time outside my womb. He never left my arms after that and slept by my side on the bed all through the night. Another precious and gorgeous baby boy. My second little man. Elliott William.
How so VERY easy it is to open your heart and love someone else so much, so fast. Sooo EASY.
Thursday, July 9, 2009
I can't put him down long enough to type out a coherent sentence. Somethings I will note about this week though.
1) I love having John home and fear the day he returns back to work.
2) The boy loves Boob. His discharge weight was 7lbs 3.5oz!! Pretty darn good for a BF baby.
3) OMG..he is so darn cute. How did I get so lucky to have two really cute baby boys?
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Kids can be cruel! Pops parents are paving the way for a lifetime of teasing. We live in a society where gender roles happen to be strictly defined, perhaps a bit too much, however that is the way it is. To each there own, I guess, but this is a child and he has no voice in the matter.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
This is a chocolate brown infant kimono with a lighter brown coffee-ish colored piping and it is so small you would think it was made for dolls. Completely adorable. Option # 2 is a cute striped number by Zutano's Itzy Bitzy line for newborns:
This, being blue, looks more boy-ish to me and even though I would have no problem dressing it on a girl, I think I would only choose option 2 over option 1 if we have a baby boy who is pushing 9+ pounds. So with that said this is a definite contender. I also purchased a few packs of sex-specific receiving blankets made By Dwell Studio for Target (ridiculously sweet/affordable line that, style-wise, is right up my alley):
**Realizing that all newborn babies look like miniature sized, old, Asian men but STILL.....
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
* Our weekend ended with a lovely visit to The Nixon's home in Arkansas to visit with Jerry and Katy and enjoy a delicious lunch and engage in good conversation. Finn was smitten with Katy, and she got a few hugs from our new found cuddily little boy.
Friday, June 5, 2009
Yeah, that about sums up how I feel these days. That and the late afternoon extreme exhaustion/still can't nap during the day syndrome, coupled with the feeling of carrying a watermelon between my legs walking around wondering if a baby may just fall out on to the floor at any moment (how was that for a visual, huh?) Oh and wait, I forgot the ever present feeling of guilt of not being able to keep up with my very active toddler. He runs much much faster than me these days and has the energy level of emo raver strung out on coke at an all night disco. Can't. Keep. Up.
But wait! There is light at the end of the misery tunnel! In my inter web research I was able to find that being 8-9 months pregnant is actually harder than caring or a newborn + toddler. That is reassuring news!! So really I am no longer scared of the creepy floaty baby in the sidebar anymore. 30 days left? Yipppee Skipee!
We've been out having too much fun...
So what have we been up to the past couple of weeks? Well, in an extreme self-loathing moment when I was on the phone in near tears with my mom my dad offered to come pick Finn and I up for a much needed 'break' away from the monotony. We had a wonderful three days in Woodstock, one of which included a trip to the Abbey Grand Lodge, the resort I vacationed at as a child to use there indoor pool facilities(in true Woodstock fashion the weather was cold/rainy and in the 50's). My mom drove us home on Friday and babysat for us that night so I could take John out for his birthday. We had a lovely outdoor dinner followed by....wait for it....BOWLING. Yeah, what a sight, right? Aside from the fact that I felt like I could tip over at any moment and roll down the lane and I looked like I was stealing one of the balls on the way out, it was actually quite fun!
Well, that brings me to the first week of June, aka, the start of the last month of my pregnancy. I didn't realize until today that I have a PACKED CALENDAR this month. Finn started his summer day out program at Webster Presbyterian Church this past Monday. Next week we start swim classes. Next weekend we leave for our river vacation. The 4th of July will be here in no time flat. This boy (?) needs a name ASAP!!!!Appropriately dressed in black as if mourning the loss of my pre-babe body
*Update on the pregnancy: I went to my 35 week appointment today. Baby is doing well, measuring 5lbs/11oz. I am 1 CM dilated and the head is down.
Monday, May 18, 2009
This was not our plan at all. The plan was to find a good school that he would be able to attend in a year or so when we were all ready for him to go. Then a couple things happened. We found a great, no amazing, school where he could learn more than just his colors, letters, and numbers. The school is aimed exactly for children HIS age. And that's not all folks...he is ready to be away from me for a few days a week. He yearns for interaction outside the house. I know it. He is bored with our coloring, our toys, our playgroups. I can play with him all day long and can still get the sense that he wants more. Not to mention the fact that he has a new brother or sister on the way and my time will be split even further. He's ready and I'm heartbroken just thinking about it, and oh, did I mention that it's just for 3 days a week until January?
"And the magical things you can do with that ball will make you the winning-est winner of all. "
"You'll be on your way up! You'll be seeing great sites! " He will be attending the International Schoolhouse in Olivette which is a Spanish immersion program I was lucky enough to find while researching a local Charter school. We met his coordinator and teachers and they were so SO impressive. The price is right and honestly I haven't felt this passionate about a school related decision since I decided to move to NYC to go to FIT. He will be in a play-based class with children who are 24-30 months old until January and then he will move to 5DAY A WEEK class until he is ready for Kindergarten. This means that he will be potentially be there for 4 years. We have NO INTENTIONS of sending him to Kindergarten early, in fact, quite the opposite.
I am so excited for him. I am eager to see him grow in this new challenge and learn a new language (actually more than just being excited for him I am jealous...I want to learn Spanish too. Insert sad frowny face here). I have been struggling planning each of our weeks with fun activities and attending as many playgroup dates as possible and I know he is a happy child. But....what else can I do? Each day that I grow more and more pregnant it becomes harder for me to run around and chase him and throw him around and I can tell he senses a big life change is headed his way. He is a perceptive kid. He sees this growing belly. We read him the Little Golden book Baby Dear where the little girl gets a new doll and a new baby sister. He totally gets it. I am constantly conflicted with thoughts...am I doing enough? Is he getting bored with me? He is such a social child and he only regularly sees maybe 3-4 people in his life. He needs/wants more and he will be able to have that in a safe and lovely setting. So off he goes August 31st which marks the second biggest day of our summer.
"You're off to great places! You're off and away"
I would just like to take a moment to congratulate my future sister-in-law, Rene, on graduating from LAW SCHOOL this past weekend. I think Dr.Suess would be very impressed with this very important direction you've chosen as am I. Well done.
Monday, May 11, 2009
Thursday, May 7, 2009
The baby is moving around even more these days and the movements are so exaggerated and strong that I feel like I am carrying around a toddler in my belly instead of a newborn. Which reminds me of my most recent doctor visit. The baby is measuring 'big' when she measures my uterus with the tape. I am going to have a 35 week ultrasound for growth, so it not just me...this baby might actually be really big! At this point the baby should weigh about 3.3 pounds, the size of a bag of navel oranges or perhaps a nice big meat-y sirloin steak.
Friday, May 1, 2009
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Saturday, April 25, 2009
I really wanted to try and take him to new/exciting locations that we have never visited before or change it up appropriately by adding new activities. I give you a week in review via photos:
Tuesday afternoon spent gazing at eye level airplanes at the Science Center
Wednesday morning spent at Mary's house with the playgroup, playing with all of AJ's toys
An amazing Thursday afternoon feeding the ducks (and swan) at Lafayette Square Park
Friday morning running through the hosta plants after feeding the fish at the Botanical Gardens
And finally the topper on the cake, the grand finale to end all of fabulous weeks...a sunny Saturday afternoon spent with Dee-da (Finn's new name for John):
In Tower Grove Park where Dee-da scored Finn some balll-ooons...
Friday, April 24, 2009
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
The St.Louis Zoo, Forest Park:
This is probably one of my favorite spots to go in St.Louis and I have sung its praises here and there and pretty much to anyone who will listen. This is my favorite zoo in the whole wide world and delicious icing on the zoo cake is that it is FREE. The St.Louis Zoo is the third largest in the country and is home to 22, 805 exotic animals many of them rare or endangered. Some of our favorite exhibits include the sea lion show, The river's edge (an elephant exhibit), and the big cat country. There is also a great children's zoo where kids can pet the animals and carousel, both of which are free the first hour of the day that they are open.
The Missouri Botanical Garden, Tower Grove:
The Missouri Botanical Garden is a National Historic Landmark with 79 acres of beautiful scenic landscaping and structures. The entrance fee is $8 for adults and free to children 12 and under. On Wednesday and Saturday mornings it is free to everyone. Some of Finn's favorite activities include feeding the giant Koi fish in the Japanese Gardens and running through the maze gardens. The Botanical Gardens can even be a great winter destination with a visit through the Climatron, a glass geodesic dome through which you can stroll through even when there is snow on the ground.
Grant's Farm South Saint Louis:
Animal shows, a tram ride through the wildlife preserve and a petting area...what more could a kid want? It is home to more than 100 different species from 6 different continents. The farm is owned and operated by the Anheuser-Busch family estate and was once owned by former president, Ulysses S. Grant of whom the Farm is named after . It is free to all ages and there is no reservation required.
The Delmar Loop (named after the old streetcar turnaround), University City:
The street known as Delmar Blvd (Soon to be Barack Obama Blvd.) is a destination in itself. Founder Joe Edwards, music promoter and one of Johns hero's, single-handedly turned one of St.Louis sagging neighbors around 30 years ago turning it into a cultural attraction today. The Loop has something for everyone: great little one-of-a-kind inexpensive restaurants, playgrounds, unique stores, and theatres. One of our family's favorite jaunts in the loop is a record store called Vintage Vinyl. It has music stations set up with headphones and new music available to listen to on the spot. Anyone can download music clips from youtube or itunes but in my opinion nothing beats a good old fashioned headphone in the record store experience.
The Gateway Arch, Downtown St.Louis:
Although Finn has yet to visit The Arch in downtown St.Louis, this is an attraction for older kiddos and is not be missed. Standing 630 ft. tall, The Arch is our nations tallest man-made monument and has plenty of exciting activities. You can take a tram ride to the top, see a documentary film about the history of the Arch, or explore the Lewis and Clark exhibit. The Arch has been one of St. Louis most popular tourist attraction since it was built in October 1965.
Monday, April 13, 2009
So, my little Chinese cabbage is growing nicely....just a tad over 2 pounds now and about 15 inches long. Some new symptoms have presented themselves, some continue, and some are now long gone. I am starting to get ligament pain, which is not really pain so much as an odd stretching/pulling feeling in my hip/lower abdominal area. I remember this very clearly from last time and it's not that bothersome. Also, DREADED heartburn has set in. So far it's not as bad as last time (probably b/c I am remembering 9 mo heartburn vs. 6 mo heartburn). I am waking up everyday at 5:45 now vs. 6:20. Damn. It's just going to get earlier and earlier from here, I suppose.
My nesting habit has gone into O-V-E-R-drive. Let me tell ya, today I made no less than 7 lists. I even made a list of lists. And I can't even be IN the house if the house is not top to bottom clean. Laundry rarely sits and waits for a full load before it is in the wash to be cleaned. I have a date set for the First Annual Duckworth Spring Cleaning Event and I am literally counting down the days. If I could, I would replace creepy floaty baby ticker with a Spring Cleaning ticker. Maybe a little washing machine going round and a round with 19 days left counting down for me. Now ThAT is more my speed these days. I am so sure my little cabbage could care less about clean laundry and organized closets but....it is what it is.
I am SERIOUSLY no longer underweight. NO longer is that an ISSUE anymore, Self. So get the memo, kay?? I had to hide the girl scout cookies from myself which is quite easy these days since I have pregnancy amnesia. I have NO idea where they are, so GOOD. So in light of that I give you a 27/28ish week pic:
(There will be NO MORE exposed belly shots while my HUGE stomach is pasty pale white)
**A side note about my firstborn...Finn does not have a hernia, which means no immediate surgical intervention is necessary. Yay! However, he does have a hydrocele. Boo. The surgeon says it could disappear by age 2, so we have a follow up visit in 6 months so he can decide if it needs to be removed or not.
Friday, April 10, 2009
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
The 3 1/2 years that followed were filled with constant affirmations of my decision to move there. The classes were taught by professors who held real life fashion executives roles in their former lives and I received the best education of my life. Not only that but I spent my spare time shopping trendy, one of a kind stores and attending Museum Openings celebrating the careers of people like Bob Mackie and Cher. There job placement program landed me several interviews proceeded by several offers and I was left to decide which option I was best suited for. In the end I chose to stay in New York and took a job with Federated Merchandising Group working as a Product Assistant for INC. I learned a great deal about the business of fashion that first year and was quickly promoted. I was also lucky enough to attend a photo shoot in the Meatpacking District featuring Heather Mills as our celeb model. One day we were standing around the studio when lo and behold Sir Paul himself gets out the limo and kisses his misses goodbye (good times..... and poor unknowing bastard).
It was around that time that I decided enough is enough with New York. I'm broke, yo! And after a series of events including falling in love with the man that is now my husband, I moved to good ole St.Louis. So what's a Manolo-clad, Gucci-bag toting girl to do in the city best known for it's huge metal monument and Cardinal baseball?? Like kismet, the same month I started looking for a job, a Nordstrom was opening its doors nearby. I started in Sales in the Designer Department and in eight short months I became the manager of the department. In my role I was able to not only dress people in amazing fashion and build a kick-ass clientele, but I was also able to put my signature mark on the department through merchandising and business development. I became a mentor to some and I was known for my great style and eye for colors and putting looks together to suit peoples individual personality. Yay! My calling! Cue the singing angels!
Fashion was here and there and everywhere and I not only worked the business end but I also had a quick stint in modeling (kidding, I'm not). I made a friend at Nordstrom, a keen business woman who quit to open her own store. She asked me to model clothes for her store and several months later she would ask me to catwalk a runway (yikes). She would pay me in clothes from the store, which were worth there weight in gold.
(my past life colliding with my present as I prepare to walk the catwalk, 2 months pregnant)
The passion I felt for my work would only be out-numbered by the intense love I felt for my son when he was born and knowing that being without him for the majority of the day was no way an option for me. Every smile and coo from him was like a drug and I needed my fix like a typical junkie. It was a whole new and exciting world and I LOVED (love) every minute of it. Fashion continues to play a role in my life, albeit a much smaller role and it comes through in strange ways (Finn is by far the best dressed baby in his playgroup hands down, peeps). But day in and day out I am reminded by what I would miss the most....the fashion. The days new shipments would arrive in the department filled to the brim with brand new Missoni and Cavalli and all the girls nearby would flock like sheep to drool over it. The days my favorite clients would walk into the department looking to me to show them what's new, what's hot or dress them for local events. The days when I would spend way too much time standing in front of my closet wondering what to wear or what accessory goes best with what outfit. And then I look over at my son, with his thick and tosseled sandy colored hair rocking it out in cowboy boots and thin wale cords and think I am totally were I am supposed to be right now.
(So innocent and unknowing and has no idea what crazy ideas his momma has in store for him)
Monday, April 6, 2009
I am kicking myself for adding the creepy floaty fetus ticker to the left of my blog. Every time I come here it sits there with its huge head floating around, numbers dwindling down before my eyes, reminding me that there are just days left of this pregnancy. You see, months seem so much longer. It's like you say....well I still have 3 months. 14 weeks. Okay, that's a lot of time to me, but 90 days...NINETY DAYS...wha...whah..what??? THAT'S IT?! See ya! I got to get to Target to get some more newborn swaddlers and nipple cream, STAT!!
According to Babycenter at 26 weeks, the fetus' ears are now more sensitive and may be able to distinguish my voice to others. Cuteness!!! Time to start getting back into music/stop bitching at John all the time. Speaking of Babycenter, I could hardly wait to find out what food my babe was compared to this week after last weeks rutabaga debacle.....Ready for THIS???? Well ready or not here it is...........................................................................................
(an English hothouse cucumber)
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Every little thing he does is magic. Every little thing he do just makes me smile. Even though my life before was tragic. Now I know my love for him goes on.I get chastised for not making a big to do about birthday's as an adult, but with children it's another story. A story where this week is one of the brightest and happiest of my life because I am the proud mom of an 18 month old perfectly amazing human being. And if that is not a reason to celebrate than I don't know what is.
On to less sappy topics. I took Finn to his 18 month check up today. Some good news, some potential bad news. First his stats:
Weight: 27 pounds, 13 ounces (75th percentile)
Height: 34 inches (97th percentile)
So the good news is that developmentally speaking he is right on track. In fact, the boy was showing off in front of the doctor. He said 'ball' and 'teddy' right there in front of her, almost as if he had been coached (no, I didn't....I would neeeeeevvver do anything like that). He's running, he's pointing, he's stacking blocks as tall as his head. No problem.
So the bad news is he may have a hernia. I know. Sucks. We have a consult with a (gasp) Pediatric Surgeon at Cardinal Glennon Hospital. No sense in worrying about this until we get it confirmed, and even then, it is apparently "really common" and "nothing to worry about." So that is that.